No escape

Content warning: discussion of trauma, intrusive thoughts and anxiety

My brain was once my own,

Where my thoughts could freely flow,

Now it is a prison cell,

A dark and scary hole.

These scary thoughts are so trapped,

I wish I could find a map,

To guide me out of this darkness,

To a place where brighter days are starting.

They say trauma can be so lonely,

Yet how ironic that this can be true,

When my head is constantly filled,

With horrible thoughts of you.

You follow me everywhere I go,

In the car, to the shops and more,

Sometimes you join me in the park,

You rarely leave me alone,

Your constant haunting carries on,

I am never alone anymore.

You’d think you would give my brain a rest,

When I cuddle in my bed at night,

Give me a moment to feel safe for once,

But no of course you continue to rear your head instead,

Even filling my dreams with dread.

I really wish there was an escape from this,

An exhausting fearful journey,

I wish I could see an end in sight,

But there seems to be no exit light.